I am a former #shoutyourabortion acolyte who recently became pro-life. I created a new email because I am terrified you will publish my identity. I have friends whose entire relationship revolved around “women’s right to choose.”
I am 30 years old. I am happily married. My husband and I tried for a baby 6 years ago, and miscarried. We have not tried again, for many reasons. Job reasons, financial, emotional, vanity, etc. We can’t afford a baby at the moment. My biological clock is ticking and demanding that I choose.
I have little attachment to my child being my own biological child. I have a strong desire towards parenting, and raising a child, but not carrying one. I do not want to have a highly technological pregnancy at 40. Pregnancy does not appeal to me. Maybe one day I can save a child from abortion. Maybe I can adopt from foster care. I fantasize about going down to the abortion clinic and holding a sign that says “I will adopt your baby.” Can I do that? Do people do that?
People look at you weird when adoption is your first choice. I just would rather not be pregnant. I understand why women get abortions. Pregnancy is not easy. Taking responsibility for our choices that led us to pregnancy isn’t easy. If I ever get pregnant I will keep the baby.
I am not involved with a church. I have close friends who have had abortions. I am a closeted pro-lifer. I think abortion is inhumane. I know I need to speak out, that there are others like me, but I selfishly don’t want to lose friends.
Anyway, thanks for the link to “debt free adoption”. I will be heavily considering it in the next few years.
You should be very proud of yourself. Very few hardcore abortion advocates are capable of breaking the scales from their eyes. They firmly believe that a woman can never be truly free without shedding the blood of her own children. They have fully embraced the idea that some lives matter less than theirs, especially when those lives belong to their prenatal sons and daughters.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with preferring to adopt a child over conceiving a child. There are thousands of children desperate for the love and security your family can provide them. You mentioned that you can’t afford a child, but I must respectfully disagree. We had three small children while still in college. We both worked minimum wage jobs and scraped by with student loans. Those were some of the best days of our lives, surrounded by the love of our babies.
Regarding your question about trying to save a child from abortion by offering to adopt at abortion facilities, here’s what I can tell you from having actually done just that on many occasions: mothers would rather kill their children than place them for adoption. I know it’s a sad commentary on the human condition, but it’s the verified truth. I have even attempted to adopt children while working to prevent mothers from aborting their babies online. Again, without success.
Since you are now a self-confessed closeted pro-lifer, I will leave you with a few things to seriously consider as you struggle to find your voice. You now know that a child living in the womb holds equal value to any other child. If you would confront your friends for advocating for infanticide, why won’t you confront them for advocating for abortion? If you would confront your friends for ripping the arms and legs off of their toddlers, why won’t you confront them for doing the same to a prenatal child? When you find your voice, others will step out of the shadows and we’ll bring this tragedy to an end. No friendship is worth a child’s life.
Like you, I’m not a member of any church. In fact, I’m one of those rare pro-life atheists, yet I work tirelessly with my Christian friends to end abortion. In other words, if you lose the friendships of those who fight to abort innocent children on demand and without apology, you will gain far better friends in those who fight to protect them.
Search your local area for pro-life groups to join or start volunteering at your local pregnancy resource center. You won’t regret it.
“The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.”
Be a voice for the voiceless by subscribing to our weekly digest and sharing the truth with the world.
I think it is awesome that you have spoken your mind about this. You are courageous. I think you will gain the nerve to let where you stand be known, eventually. I am openly pro-life but I used to always have difficulty speaking out (about anything) since childhood due to extreme shyness and fear of people. I was bullied in school and raped. And then I was in an abusive relationship for 10 years. God gave me the strength to get out and become stronger. Now I stand up, no problem! I don’t put up with anything, and I stand up for others. I even laugh in the face of adversity! I’m like, “go ahead!”… The first hurdle is the hardest, but then when you see that you can do it, you will start to feel good about it. When you stand up to people who you know will probably persecute you, amazing things can happen. If you think that innocent helpless little babies are going to die if you do not do something, you will start to gain the courage of a mother lion. Many people will also respect you more if you stand strong for what you believe in. (even angry abusive people) (but if some don’t, you can still know that you are acting in the right.) And amazingly, you will start to respect yourself more. Your confidence will just snowball… Try it, I know you can do it! ………. Also, I think it could still be a possibility that you might could adopt from someone who did not want their child. Though it is true that many would rather abort than adopt their child out, you can still find “some” who may let you have their child with a little persuasion. I know of some people who put ads in the paper to adopt from an individual and were willing to pay the expenses for the mother, etc., etc… and they were successful. Also one pro-life group has had some successes with standing outside of clinics and offering to adopt. So it can happen…
They firmly believe that a woman can never be truly free without shedding the blood of her own children.
mothers would rather kill their children than place them for adoption.
We had three small children while still in college. We both worked minimum wage jobs and scraped by with student loans. Those were some of the best days of our lives, surrounded by the love of our babies.
If you would confront your friends for ripping the arms and legs off of their toddlers, why won’t you confront them for doing the same to a prenatal child?
anonymous – be strong in your prolife conviction.You will never regret it.
Cultureshift – Thank you for your amazing efforts and truth.
My only problem with this response is the phrase “one of those rare pro-life atheists.” We aren’t rare, and using that word here perpetuates a myth that is harmful to the pro-life cause. It supports the view that many pro-choice people have that all abortion opponents are religious wingnuts. In the early days of my pro-life conversion, I felt pretty isolated, as if I was the only person who opposed abortion on purely non-religious grounds. In time, I found groups like Secular Pro-Life, Atheist and Agnostic Pro-Life League, Feminists for Life, Democrats for Life of America, etc. and I’ve come to learn that there are tons of people like me, and that letting our secular perspective be heard is vitally important in order to build credibility with non-religious abortion advocates.