A pregnant mother wrote an open letter to her unborn baby explaining why she ‘has’ to terminate her pregnancy. She writes in the beginning of the letter that she is ‘both sorry and not sorry’.
I can feel you in there. I’ve got twice the appetite and half the energy. It breaks my heart that I don’t feel the enchantment that I’m supposed to feel. I am both sorry and not sorry.
I am sorry that this is goodbye. I’m sad that I’ll never get to meet you. You could have your father’s eyes and my nose and we could make our own traditions, be a family. But, Little Thing, we will meet again. I promise that the next time I see that little plus, the next time you are in the same reality as me, I will be ready for you.
Little Thing, I want you to be happy. More than I want good things for myself, I want the best things for the future. That’s why I can’t be your mother right now. I am still growing myself. It wouldn’t be fair to bring a new life into a world where I am still haunted by ghosts of the life I’ve lived.
I want you to to have all the things I didn’t have when I was a child. I want you to be better than I ever was and more magnificent than I ever could be. I can’t do to you what was done to me: Plant a seed made of love and spontaneity into a garden, and hope that it will grow on only dreams.
Love and spontaneity are beautiful, but they have little merit. And while I have plenty of dreams to go around, dreams are not an effective enough tool for you to build a better tomorrow. I can’t bring you here. Not like this.
I love you, Little Thing, and I wish the circumstances were different. I promise I will see you again, and next time, you can call me Mom
Why can’t ‘Little Thing’ have all the things you want for them? Why can’t you be their life-long hero and be their birth mother?
You don’t have to kill your child if you can’t or don’t want to raise them. You can place them for adoption and let them continue to grow, let them discover the beauty and wonder of life, and let them know the love of a family, even if you cannot provide that love right now.
You have provided no reason why you can’t continue to protect and nourish your child. You have provided no reason why you must have them ripped from your womb. Even if you did, I can assure you that there is no reason good enough to justify killing your child. Many people will tell you that no reason is required for you to kill your own, but it is reason that separates us from the barbarians we once were. It is reason that gives us our humanity and our compassion.
The child growing within you needs you more now than they ever will again. Please give them the remaining time they need to survive until their birth. Please give them what you were once given. Life.
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